Photo Credit: frontpagemag.comOver a decade after thousands of New Yorkers were murdered by Muslim terrorists, the city’s mayor is declaring victory in the War on Salt. Next up he plans to wage a spring offensive on Styrofoam cups. After that, who knows?
We live in surreal times. In the Middle Ages, cats and rats were put on trial. In this modern age, we are fighting wars on food ingredients, the bags we carry them in and the containers out of which we eat and drink them.
There’s no telling what surreal enemy our wise and brilliant leaders will declare war on next. Shoes? Pepper? Umbrellas? Mathematics? The color blue? There’s just no way to know anymore.
The United States has lost the War in Afghanistan, a minor matter that no news outlet can find the time to report on because they’re too busy covering a breaking story about a Republican senator taking a sip of a water. Maybe a War on Water can be next. Was there a Styrofoam cup involved? It’s time for one of those hard-hitting investigations that reminds us what a loss it will be when the last newspaper is strangled with the entrails of the last news network.
But who can find the time to fight a war against Islamic terrorists, when there are more pressing wars to be fought? Like a war on being fat.
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